Willy Futterwacken's Traveling Diss Card Emporium

Willy Futterwacken's Traveling Diss Card Emporium is an event that can be reached with the Traveling Salesman Neutral Effect. It can also simply be a random event.

Shop Introduction

Traveling Salesman: Diss Cards
In the distance you see a traveling salesman! You walk up to an extravagantly dressed man. His cart is... colorful. 'Welcome to my spectacular Diss Card Emporium! I'm Willy Futterwacken, can I help you?' [Yes][No]

Shop Interface

Willy Futterwacken's Traveling Diss Card Emporium
'Diss Cards are amazingly meta and can break down any fourth wall! If you want to win this board game, then step right up and pick a card... for a price!'
Item	Price	Description upon purchase
Diss Card: Knockback	7 Rupees	'Knock knock, who's there? It's a Diss Card: Knockback!'
Diss Card: Steal Monies	10 Rupees	'Want to buy more stuff? Use this Diss Card to 'borrow' some Rupees!'
Diss Card: Ensnare	15 Rupees	'Is life going too fast for you? Use this Diss Card and slow things down a bit.'
Diss Card: Death	20 Rupees	'This card emanates dark power. Use it if you want someone to lose their hat! Haha!'
Diss Card: Speed Exchange	30 Rupees	'Don't you just hate it when people are faster than you? Turn the tables and show them how it feels!'
Diss Card: Shift	1500 Rupees	'The most powerful of my Diss Cards. Just... shift the odds in your favor, if you catch my drift!'
Generic post-purchase quote
Willy hands you a X...'More cards to fill up your deck, mister?'
Insufficient funds quote
'Sorry, mister! I may be mad as a hatter, but I'm not selling my cards for free!'
Death quote
You seem to have died near Willy Futterwacken's Traveling Diss Card Emporium... He knocks your corpse away with a Diss Card: Knockback.
Leaving quote
'Alright, mister. Good luck winning this crazy board game!'